Woody Allen quotes
14 quotes by Woody Allen. Topics: Film, Success.
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“Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.”
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“I took a speed-reading course and read 'War and Peace' in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.”
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“If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.”
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“I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.”
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“It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.”
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“I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.”
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“I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.”
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“Eighty percent of success is showing up.”
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“I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.”
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“His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.”
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“How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?”
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“It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.”
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“Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.”
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“Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-- particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.”